LADIES! Listen up.

If you are going to judge me for talking about sex toys, please stop reading this and go look at one of my Instant Pot or green smoothie recipes instead. Beloved straight dude friends, go away. Go read my love letter to a hot dog.
Still there? Pause whatever you’re doing and buy yourself a Womanizer right now.

No, not a creepy man. I’m not talking about that kind of womanizer – those are usually available for free (and still a bad investment). I’m also not talking about a Britney Spears song.

I’m talking about the very best sex toy for women. The Womanizer might have a lame name, but you will quickly forgive it. Very quickly.

Update: THERE’S A NEW WOMANIZER MODEL IN TOWN THAT ALSO HAS INTERNAL STIMULATION. Let me know if you try it! I haven’t yet.

Womanizer review

It’s a bit hard to describe. It’s not a vibrator. It doesn’t vibrate at all actually.

It has this little cup you put over your clitoris, but there’s no direct clit contact. When you turn it on (by holding down the fancy crystal button), air starts circulating. You adjust the intensity to your liking and BAM.

WOW.

LoveHoney description of the amazing Womanizer:

More than a vibrator, its gentle clitoral sucker really elevates sensation, drawing delicate spots in to provide insistent stimulation that’s then exacerbated by 8 speed vibrations. Cup your pearl with the hollow silicone tip to experience the unbelievable engulfment of this delicious external toy.

Womanizer features:

Small and fits comfortably in your hand.
Comes with two sizes of clit cups. (I like them both. They offer up different levels of sensation.)
Many different levels of intensity (8 of them!) to find what works for you. Level 1 is usually plenty for me, but I often play a bit with the levels, going up a few and then back down.
It is easy to change levels and turn on/off while in use.
Quiet!
Easy to clean and care for.
Comes with a little storage bag.
Rechargeable.
Charge lasts a LONG time.
Fast, strong and long orgasms. Again and again. Do you really need to know anything else?

Seriously, ya’ll. Get yourself a Womanizer. I was nervous because of the price. It was well worth the investment and more.

AND IT’S ON SALE. BIG SALE!

You can use this repeatedly and for long lengths of time without getting the numbness that comes with most vibrators. Have an amazing orgasm. Then have another. And another.

I’m talking minutes. Under five. I timed the action a couple times. Three minutes. Four minutes. Buzzfeed reviewers were amazed to have orgasms in three minutes or less.

And these orgasms are INTENSE and LONG.

Because there’s no numbness or fatigue, you can keep right on going if you want!

Do me a favor and share this with your friends please! It’s scary and uncomfortable to talk about sex toys and masturbation, so I’d love it if you helped me bring others into the conversation.

Lovehoney is offering 10% off everything for Rambling Rach readers!!!! Lovehoney discount. Code HONEYX10. GO GET YOUR WOMANIZER. You’re welcome in advance.