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How to Make an Amazing Fairy Cake In Under an Hour

1. Decide to bake your bestie a belated birthday cake an hour before she and her dude arrive at your house.
2. Pull out the box of pink lemonade cake mix you got on clearance for .35 at Big Lots.  Note it hasn’t quite expired. #winning
3. Realize you have no eggs.
4. Call teenage daughter who is on her way home and ask her to stop for eggs.
5. Congratulate daughter’s boyfriend for carrying in the eggs without dropping them, unlike last time.
6. Tell the other teenage couple who arrived with them about the time the boyfriend ruined Easter by dropping the eggs you bought to dye.
7. Prepare cake batter.
8. Pick out eggshell pieces the best you can and keep going.
9. Ask daughter why batter is so thick.
10. Assure her of course you followed directions. Duh.
11. Pour thick batter in baking pan.
12. Realize you didn’t follow directions and missed adding water.  
13. Add water directly to the pan and stir that bitch up. With a fork.
14. Put cake in preheated oven (cuz you really did follow most of the directions).
15. Realize you have no frosting.
16. Decide to call it a trendy “naked” cake.
17. Let cake cool about five minutes and then impatiently flip it onto a plate.
18. Scream when it falls apart.
19. Yell for daughter to ask her what to do.
20. Do not accept defeat when she says throw it away.
21. Put the broken pieces of cake back in place as teenagers try to eat them.
22. Pile colorful mini marshmallows, gummy bears and pop rocks on top of broken cake as teenagers try to eat them.
23. Proudly declare to bestie you have made a FAIRY CAKE especially for her when she arrives.
24. Beam as she posts photos of the cake all over social media, declaring how loved she feels.
25. Pass out hunks of Fairy Cake, which everyone declares delicious.
26. Hope you are the only one crunching on eggshell.